9.6.09

simply incredible. period.


quite a recent phenomenon, the smallest things in life have became ignitions for the brightest laughter in my world. through communication of the most ordinary means, whether it be a simple in-person conversational fragments or an invisible, physically-non-existing silvery weave of most delicate spider silk of binaries, the mundane, plain, even prosaic cogwheels of the daily habits and rituals have catalyzed feelings beyond the initially flat-looking brown of daily mud. incandescent, effulgent explosion of aspirations and riches beyond the normality of the days, quickly becoming something anew.

at unexpected moments- random dots loosely connecting the day, i am surprised to be surrounded by whiffs of near-delusional sensations. the normal rain drops, a quiet running sounds from my speakers, a tickle of dust riding the playful wind from outside- uproars strong enough to reach 32nd floor, they all become parts that results in somewhat exponential sum as a whole- general sense of happiness.

happiness, a word that is often frowned upon by many, including my-prior-self, somehow (well, actually, through process that is not-random-at-all) became a new faint tattoo across my consciousness. i am happy and content.

no, content wont do justice.

elated.
intoxicated.
with gay abandon.

call me a fool.
but the poet neruda agrees:
You are like nobody since I ____ you.
such simple word have became so much larger and so much richer that one can feel the flutters of the smallest butterflies. a word that i cannot no longer simply pronounce, but need to announce, with utmost care. word that demands... respect, from me. a concept, a connection, whatever it may be- multifaceted, carefully crafted princess cut of million reflections, that is so much richer than just a word.

if i get more soapy i am going to have to think about going into the toiletry business. perhaps it is the jetlag. may be it's the 30s getting to my head. or could it be that i am simply enclosed in a newly found luxury?

Nur du befreist den Lenz in der Brust, nur du, nur du.

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