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Showing posts from April, 2010

got my messages?

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wickannish inn@ tofino, van island. gabe was here for interview. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FfFKM3_Ay8g Going home, going home I'm just going home Quiet light, some still day I'm just going home It's not far, just close by Through an open door Work all done, care laid by Going to fear no more Mother's there expecting me Father's waiting, too Lots of folk gathered there All the friends I knew All the friends I knew I'm going home Nothing's lost, all's gain No more fret nor pain No more stumbling on the way No more longing for the day Going to roam no more Morning star lights the way Restless dream all done Shadows gone, break of day Real life begun There's no break, there's no end Just a living on Wide awake with a smile Going on and on Going home, going home I'm just going home It's not far, just close by Through an open door I am going home I'm just going home (a version

fragments

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i am here in kelowna and i am leaving tomorrow. i came to pick my brother up and i will just do that. awesome.  it is a task that i would have never wanted to let anyone else do it. i have no idea why. nevertheless, here i am. am very lucky.  i just wish we can catch the direct flight. fingers crossed. damn. weather forecast says that saturday may rain. that would not be so nice. but it is only 30%.  so even if they were right, it may not rain after all. please hold it till the evening brooding clouds! time has gone fast.  one of my childhood acquittance, fr. john will perform the mass for gabe. ha. i bet neither (or anyone) really saw that one coming.  well, i didnt, for sure.  i am glad that someone who knew him will be leading the service. i am eating all kinds of junk food.  not because i dont have enough time, but because i want to.  decadent in times of suffering? i think much work are to be done from this point, including amending an old 'lack

notice update

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hello all, i hope each one of us had a good week, even in midst of trials and difficult moments, each of their own and as part of a larger collective group. i am heading back to toronto tomorrow with my brother. he'll be all clean and fresh, no longer bound to the flesh wounds. i am glad as one could be at this point. and once back in toronto, there will be a service for him at the catholic church: it will be taken place on saturday 1 may 2101 at 10:00am at st. andrew kim korean catholic church the service will be lead by fr. john park and would be about an hour long. the church is located at: 849 Don Mills Rd. North York M3C 1W1 (416)447-4078 i am very glad to say thanks to you all who have been so sympathetic to my family and please do not feel badly if you are busy. this was a sudden event and rather than rushing it, i would rather take the comfort in fact that you will remember my brother in passing moments in upcoming days. please take good care of yourselves

notice

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i am here to update on behalf of my brother from kelowna, bc. i do not have the contact of all his friends so i thought, even just for off-chance, i should may be make a small post about the current situation. gabe has been involved in fatal auto accident on 26 april 2010. he was in vancouver attending his affairs- professional and personal,and unfortunately, he was too tired to complete the drive. during the night, he was trying to complete the last leg of the drive from tofino-vancouver-kelowna to see some friends.  but at highway 97, N49'48'18555" and W 119'43'41.424", approx. between 2-230am, he lost the control of the vehicle. it was a human error we believe, and luckily, the death would have been instantaneous.  quite a silver lining. i am not too sure what we are going to do for the memorial services for now, but if you would like further information, please let me know.  by thursday evening, we will be able to bring my brother home.  i am doin

ashes and bits

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i loved him dearly every bits he was wee little full of buggers and bugs mischievous or annoying i couldnt tell nor i differentiated the two one day i realized he is taller one day i realized he is stealing my fags when he said he'll go look for a new opportunity i said go and see whats out there shame on you for not trying to leave the city earlier rainy days in kelowna storms mad winds even the ships stopped for a bit for that sea was angry and untamed if the ships arent moving does he have to cross the depth of acheron all by himself never in my life i wondered about carrying ashes in my hands it is all just a big masquerade in my head for now i loved him dearly every bits he will always be wee little full of buggers and bugs stolen fags

resonance across stone and flesh

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mr. banksy has a habit of appearing at uncanny places when most unexpected. and oddly, his characters- especially the rats, are hilarious, dirty, often clueless and brilliant simultaneously. how is it possible? i have no clue.  but here's a rat of banksy's, as found in china town, in a dirty closed-shop window.  holding- what i thought was a clarinet (ahaha. perhaps for personal safely, i should say it looks like a rocket or a missile). the best thing about banksy is that his icons speak so many different things at given context. this one- i have no idea what it actually wants to say, but clearly, it is whimsical.  it made me laugh and me laughing consequently made others to stop and take a good look.  it is always nice to stop to take a look at the smallest differences in daily routine and pathways.  we all realize it's never the same. well, then lets not take it for granted. as it is another spring friday, i was walking not slowly, but with no particular drive in my st

square envelop

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a short square envelop came with waft of spring and renewal message from the eastertide full of hope and nice thoughts with hint of banff pines and that head-clearing white-ice smell of winter unasked however freely offered it crossed the miles and miles of oceans roads mountains and people and it came and landed one of the most sincere moments in life when a person can speak without worries misunderstanding expectation when a person can listen and be warmed by the simplicity of shared overlapping joys of miracles if one can understand another through the miles of distances different words and languages encapsulated thoughts on paper of resonance that has came over the time that would be miracle and it came today in mail i am the recipient of the square envelop which holds many speckles of laughters and appreciation a human being to another like the spring bird it swooped down and whispered the news of eastertide, afar in sho

april maiden and king of may

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alponse mucha, one of the best of art nouveau, the grande style of fin de siecle. this is spring, from his four seasons series. (rest of the photos are monkey photos from here and there, around work-home route. i am rather proud of them) today the light was that of a pale, faintly-scented, young woman. the girl with brown ginger hair, feisty but she does not know yet. her beauty lies in fact she is oblivious to it. simply occupied with other treasures she finds on her way, she have not seen herself in the bubbling brooks nor calm pond, to see how she captivates her surroundings- the branches full of life, leaves and flowers, the clouds that provide gentle cover from bright daylight, the air that is hot, full of energy and vigor, seeking relief, looking for its mate. with the sudden blossoms everywhere, it is difficult to pick out which flowers are the most beautiful. i say though the bunched hyacinths are pretty, they are too intense, too close to the ground. easily missed and alm

good luck mrs q

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long time ago. i would call out to my brother (or his direction, i would say): 'hey, slowpoke!' and he would turn around and be upset. and i would try to getaway with it: mom: dont call your brother by name! (bro sobbing) monkey: but mom, really, i was looking for a slow dude, and if he thinks he is one of them, it's not my fault! mom: then why did you call him that? monkey: i wasnt! he just decided to answer. is it my fault? mom: (point to corner) monkey: (shuts up and goes to corner to stand quietly) haha. what a problematic child. i still find it funny. i recently decided to follow a blog: http://fedupwithschoollunch.blogspot.com want to know what it is? do go check it out yourself! anyways. she made a comment awhile ago on a post about how people may have done something to get to a point of obesity and it sparked many anger. i think it is grossly misdirected. much anger and reactions. weight issue is a sensitive one. sigh. i should know. i was an overweight kid.

cant just do one thing

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last night was a small dinner gathering at the chemist's place with german medieval scholar and monkey. chemist is a very interested in things like backyard gardening, healthy and sustainable cooking (vegetarian he is), and is a very enthusiastic cook. both german scholar and monkey like to cook and eat with others as well, which means it's always a good time to cook and eat. underemployed doctor monkey, two phd students, we are a talkative bunch. the topics jump from catch up from the last choir concert to easter, house renovation to heterotopia. and the most nicest thing about such crowd is that we are not bound by politeness or previous exposure to a new subject. everyone is eager to take a piece of the current conversation to continue. and i continue to chew on last nights supper leftover, seaweed-noodle-green stew-ish thing (it does taste much better than it may sound), i cant help but to reflect on a simple expression: one cannot just do one thing. it is a borrowed expr

happy jesus, chocolate bunnies and sundry-thoughts

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7-foot, bronze statue that hangs 200 feet in the air on a church bell tower in East Sussex, England. It has been dubbed by the locals as "Jesus in jeans." the holy week and easter wknd is always a bit of a mess. after 40 days of repenting madness will do that to any soul i suppose (though the modern practice itself is much softer than the ones of contemporary ramadan, from what i have seen personally). easter, an old tradition that is familiar to most of the westerners now primarily exists in forms of: chocolate bunnies hot crossed buns egg hunts (which is just bizarre, it has nothing to do with anything) dyed eggs (and consequent egg/cress salads) luncheons or brunches (family stuff made easy by long wknd) church services (one of the two- the other being christmas) and probably in that order of importance as well. hey there's nothing wrong with it. really. it's been a busy week. theres been lots of classical music running around town in forms of cantatas, passions,