first negative b day

(art from nataliedee.com. yeah for cake)
hello wee brother.  your first negative birthday was an eventful one at the least.

first of all, someone has already taken the kind liberty of dedicating you a mass on your birthday.  so couple weeks ago, the older ladies of the house freaked out that you wont get a mass on 25th. seems that it was no worries to begin with.  so though it's during the weekday and that mom/dad had power outage at the store in the earlier day (probably brown outs with all those suburban houses i swear), we all decided to have a mass-get-together kinda thing.

ironically, we forgot, well, dad forgot to read the line that says: 'this mass will be a private service,' as the priest was going to be away from the city during a short retreat with the altar boys. so after much commotion, we got there to learn that your mass was in fact, being served somewhere in nice outside park of ontario.  koodos for style man.

then we went out for dinner. what did we have? well, we had dad's favorite: all-you-can-eat!  at this point, i do have to defend my dad a bit.  see, he really does not know what he may want. nor he likes to tuck into one thing and that one thing only. he's a bit known in my family to pick off from other people's plate, not necessarily because he likes it, but because he's merely curious.  the critique is always a bit mouthful as well.  so there's the initial comic point. you would also be a bit amused on the fact that he's more interested in food since youve left and mike have came back home.  he's been trying to get involved in new things, including this newly acquired interests in black teas (guess who will supply the tea -> me!).  he is now even willing to try non-standard places to go eat! so im going to dig up some 905 eateries, probably chinese places. yum.  of course, you would known some good ones already. darn. my loss. but anyhows. about this dinner thing, it gets better.

you see, so these asian all-you-can-eat is pretty much the ideal solution. but you see, you realize, that if you were actually here, we wouldve never gone to AYCE, especially for your birthday. actually i was hoping that i could take you to la papillion or terroni's for this year. your loss. ha! anyhow, thanks to you, we had a very unusual weekday evening family minus one dinner. at AYCE never the less. but do take pride that your prediction wouldve been right, as the soy-based stocks tend to be a bit too sweet over there. i suppose that was for all those non-asians. gag. ha ha. though they did grill mackerels impeccably. hum.

granny's becoming a child once again, she now has almost two teeth left, like a baby :) soon she's going to see the lovely dentist to get it all sorted out. mom/dad is going to be sweating in the dry cleaning plant in upcoming week as the forecast is bright. even, blight. really.  mike's working and i am being the usual underemployed professional.  you would be tickled to know that mr. minnow is visiting and that at the canadian national exhibition, the food to eat this year is fried butter. dont ask me. but the knob of butter on stick was just too small to be charged 5 bucks a shot.  not that i would eat a whole stick of butter fried.  okay. may be.  but then that's fairs for you.  it wouldve been nice to take you. and somehow you would have had a free day. ha ha.

so all is sort of well really.  of course there are times that one is feeling a bit less than spectacular.  i feel that way once in awhile, actually, quite often this month, as i keep thinking about your past birthdays.  it used to be the way you would have something specific picked out, way back in may or something. then i would bargain what it may be, as i strongly frown on buying frivolous things (ahhahaha), and though you always asked what i may like, we both knew that birthdays were for me to get you a little nice things for you, as the real nice things you wanted, i could not possibly pay for it (like your louis vuitton wallet, holy cow).

if you were here, we could certainly have a night out in a nice place and i would be eager to put the bill on my dr-credit card.  but instead. i send you small wishes. like bubbles, all over the calendar space.  i try not to be sad. there's nothing i could do.  but you should throughly enjoy the fact that your first negative birthday was an interesting one.  i asked mom if she cried and she said no. she is probably lying. why are our family so bad at lying? well, may be except you and i, ahhaha.  she's eager to get you some cemetery monuments- she really wanted to do this by your birthday. but you see, the cemetery employees are never in hurry, so it didnt happen. i hope you wont mind.  we'll put one up though, i swear.

i miss you.
i love you.
happy first negative birthday.
wee bro with attitude.


  1. It's amazing how, even for the most observant--among whom I certainly include you--of our kind, a catastrophe unfolds so gradually. The fact that someone will never be in our lives as before becomes ironically a part of our lives--like the space in our lives is the same but just filled up with different stuff, and it's not the same and it's not as good. But it's there, and maybe it keeps the soul from collapsing in upon itself.

  2. Hug, Cecilia. Thanks for sharing this with us...