i never start on time, what do you mean?

"i am not starting at 730, i will start at 735. why? because i always start late."
"look, we try to start things on schedule in this building. this is your 5 min call."

"i am telling you, if you dont start at 735, i am going to walk out from the concert!"
"i had to deal with tech glitches all afternoon because the gear you have rented does not work properly!"
"well, let me clear up a point; the gear that you were using is a rental through the festival, not through the hall.  and we tried and have provided the auxiliary items you have requested last minute... why dont you give me a tangible reason that i can pass on to the house manager?"

"(house manager), he wont go at 730."
"why? is there a problem?"
" he says he cant go on at 730 and if not, he's going to walk out."
"gosh. alright then."

apparently there were tech glitches all afternoon. nothing was working properly.  so the performer was all hot headed before the concert.  he casually laughs, to say that he never starts on time anyways.  then he turns angry, then threatens (me) to walk off from the concert, almost yelling at my face. so he gets what he wants. but he could have what he wanted. all he had to do was to give us a feasible reason beside: i dont want to.

they didnt have a good idea what they needed. unlike professionals, who (should) plan their program and check their gear list, this afternoon was full of request for tools and tools themselves.  nuts. bolts. failing interfaces. you name it.  on the day of the concert, they were realizing they need tool A, tool B, tool C, ooh may be that wont work at all- what of tool D? do you have it? no, i dont have it? would they have it? hey, do you guys have it? (we may or may not. but if you requested, we would certainly have it)

since they do not know what they need physically (equipment) nor have let us know what they actually have and plan to use in the concert, there is nothing that we can do. the time before the concert, allocated initially to talk to the staff, us, to communicate their final stage plan and other related things, it was spent in fussing over gears that shouldve been working (yes, angry performer, i agree, they shouldve been working all afternoon and during the dress rehearsal) and yelling at a lowly staff. why? i have no clue.

i keep thinking this is not a flash mob. it's a paying gig.  youve been in touch with your tech person from the festival for awhile.  you must have made lists and double checked with the tech. okay, so your interface failed and your computer froze. your tech didnt have the right gears and things were in rough shape.  you are trying though. trying to pull a rock star, wearing your jeans on stage and retaking starts because your gear failed. and that your engineer put your sound track far too loud, loud enough that you had to retake.

this is integral part of what normal people call preparation and dress rehearsal.  and yes, most professionals do DO them.

and if that, most people are able to give reasons beside "i am not going to, i am going to walk out!"
makes me wonder. if i was with someone else (a third person presence), would he have been that rude? i dont think so.  aha. pity, it comes to that a staff must bring another staff just to avoid being yelled at.

this week has been the most disorganized week i have had in a long long time.  i never have seen so many tech glitches, lack of leadership and just general chaos.  for instance, monday evening, the order of the program was swtiched. insteaed of 1234, we do 1243. that's fine. problem: they did notify us last minute, but failed to announce it to the group before they went for break before the show.  delayed start? yes. but it was fine, because all sorts of things were happening on the stage with no captain.  it took all afternoon and lots of people to sort it out their floor plan. sure. okay. but none of it was clear to anyone (i wonder if they had one by the end. i am an optimist, contrary to many who may know me).  so though they did have help, they didnt direct any help to any task.  instead, a visiting visual person pointed to my boss and said:

visual: can he move those screens for us for projection?
m: he's busy- (didnt get to finish)
v: well someone's gotta, geez, im used to professional environment-
(monkey loses head)
m: that man is our tonmeister. he is not here to be a last minute visual aid worker. he works to record this concert and that's what he's doing.
v: ... well, i will get (some enthusiastic student), where is he?
m: i dont even know who that is. (and that was an honest answer)

if you are used to professional environment as a visual whiz, didnt it occur to you that you are visiting a primarily audio-focused hall, therefore, no, we do not keep black fabrics to cut screens nor have workers who can read your mind (as you clearly didnt direct us for any specific stage change instructions, before or during the show? if we can read your mind, dont you think we be working at the stockmarket or something?  ooh, my bad. i suppose you work with professionals.  well, we usually do as well. except you.

and no, the things that you wanted do were not anything extraordinarily difficult. projectors, arranging seats, amp and microphones, these are standard. but i suppose you find them impossibly difficult. well, that's why we are here. though you are running around hot, doing everything because you are a hero.

a failed one.
why would i say that? well, because the piece had to restart due to tech glitches.  your machines failed. whose responsible for it? well, you are. no? okay. let me bash it with baseball bat. are you waving your arms angrily at me and yelling 'that's mine, you idiot!' well- that's that then. it is yours. gosh.

there'll be another post about citizenship soon i think.  i am tired of people being rude to others. just because they think they are better than others.  well, rather than calling self 'the most unique voice of (one's) generation,' why dont you give us the change call you how we see you? it's not even modesty, but of being fair to yourself and the world you live in.

but at the end of this day, i am worn out and i think i am better off learning to do nail-free joinery-carpentry things.  at least things like stone and woods will always reflect what you have done to them.  if you cut them wrong, they will be wrong. at least that's clear. i wonder why people think that if you yell at someone, it makes you right.  if you did wrong, you are wrong. you have wronged someone, regardless of your own emotional being. what of the others' emotional being?

a concert contract is not a flash mob.  and no, you are not a rock star. how does one tell? well, you are yelling at the wrong person. if you stop being so noisy and listen and look around you, i think both points are fairly obvious.

i often wonder where have we failed as a society to have pretended-citizens.

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